Monday, April 09, 2007

Build a penis extender you can be proud of!

Just in time for a financially precarious Drunkablog fambly:
Problogger--"helping bloggers earn money." Right away there's good stuff. Here, for example, are five tips from Darren Rowson on "How to write the perfect blog post":
1. Talk to your readers and not at them – Blogging is a two way street and you want to create a conversation.
Okay, I'll give it a shot. I often sniff my own feet. What "unusual" things do you sniff?
2. No one wants to read a ten page blog post. There is no minimum length requirement with blog posts so feel free to get to the point and don’t beat around the bush. People like skimming and reading a post with depth, precision, and as few words as possible can deliver value to your readers.
Bullshit. (Depth, check. Precision, check. As few words as possible, check.) Notice also how many unnecessary words the guy uses to tell us this. In a single sentence we're urged both to "get to the point" and "not to beat around the bush." Find other examples on your own time.

Oh, before I forget: Tim Blair has a hilarious post about the Catmeat Sheik. He even made up a funny joke:

Q: What’s the difference between Sheik Taj el-Din al Hilaly and his female followers?"


Oops. Lost my train of thought. Point three:

3. Don’t wander off topic. . . . Make sure you have a central idea and stick with it. If you are writing a blog post about the latest and greatest plasma television don’t talk about VCRs or the latest blue ray scoop.

What the hell is a blue ray scoop? Anyway, now the hard stuff:

4. Value is the key to success – Don’t you hate reading stuff that brings no value? [Yes! Yes! Yes!] There are only 24 hours in a day [hang on, I'm taking notes] so make sure whatever you write has the potential to be beneficial to your readers in some fashion.

Got that covered. Last one:

5. Entice your readers – If you can’t get anyone to read your content and interact with your blog, what’s the point of writing? You may be just writing for yourself, but chances are you want others to read your content as well. Use catchy headlines and ask your readers for their thoughts.

Readers (if any): check out number nine of the "catchy" headlines. I am good. Do you: A) agree; B) agree with slight reservations?

Better blogroll Problogger.


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