Thursday, December 23, 2010

Found stuff--doing time edition

If you're looking for something to be thankful for this Christmas (besides the usual), how about this: you're not in jail (probably).

These were in a pile of papers somebody dumped somewhere (look ma, I'm Julian Assange!). They belonged to a guy who spent something over a year in jail (Delta Correctional Center in Delta, CO) for I know not what defugalties.

One of the first handouts they gave him, one imagines. "Carry yourself in a confident manner."

In chains, as he should be:

First (or maybe second) infraction: unauthorized mail stuff:

A note to his moll: "Thank you for being the piss in my pants."

Getting an aspirin.

"when they got me."

Some of us more than others:

Keeping up on the reading. No doubt this tome is where he got "Thank you for being the piss in my pants":

Determined to change his ways:


Second infraction, contraband clothes:

Parole! One hundred bucks goodbye money. Cheap bastards.

Tips for staying out:

Update: Whoops, forgot the last page of the "Checklist for success": "Certain lifestyles are costly":

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