The claims by the imperialists that they want a free society in Iraq is a total lie. . . . Imperialists use rhetoric about humyn rights and freedom to justify their wars of aggression. In reality, imperialists themselves do the most to suppress freedom; they are the greatest violators of humyn rights. . . . Those journalists who risk their lives for truth deserve our support--whether it is Mumia Abu Jamal who sits on death row for daring to speak the truth about U.$ violence against the Black Nation, or those who in effect risk their lives to bring us the truth about U.$ imperialist crimes in Iraq.
Mumia, check. Speaking truth to power, check. Dollar signs, check. Retarded PC spelling ("humyn"), chuck, I mean, check. Funniest line: "Aljazeera is said to be considering and exploring legal options against the administration." Brilliant! The only thing the imperialist fa$cist murderers can't stop with their murdering murderousness: a lawsuit!
Lavishing attention on your houseplants can
Tookie! Tookie! Tookie!You can probably guess what they have to say about Tookie Williams' execution (in "Tookie another casualty of war"), but it's still too dumb not to quote a little:
An imperialist country with internal semi-colonies, the United $nakes is unlike socialist countries that ended the oppression of national minorities. In a socialist society, however, Tookie would have been released after being encouraged to do the kinds of things he ended up doing in his final years. But since Tookie lived in a capitalist society, he was executed and murdered [neat trick--ed.]. [But] as Tookie himself expressed in his interviews, he had redeemed himself.Oh. Well, damn.
Barrel of laughsAnd never let it be said that MIM lacks a sense of humor--because they, you know, kill anyone who says that. But jeez guys, can't you lighten up, just once? From a review of Shopgirl, the recent Steve Martin-Claire Danes movie about an older rich guy and a younger poor guy who are after the same, uh, gyrl, or something like that. No doubt the movie is ultra-putrid, but MIM uses its putridity (as good Maoists use everything) to instruct:
Under the system of patriarchy that oppresses wimmin and youth, all relationships tend toward prostitution, and all sex under patriarchy is rape or based on the rape culture no matter what the character or income of the people involved.
Now where have we heard that before?
Subjugate your knowledgesMIM also has their usual "Under lock and key" section of "news from prisons and prisoners," but I'll just quote their mission statement (same page) on the justice system in general, which begins:
Mim seeks to build public opinion against Amerika's criminal injustice system, and to eventally replace the bourgeois injustice system with proletarian justice. . . .Then they get right to building that public opinion:
All U.$. citizens are criminals--accomplices and accessories to the crimes of U.$ oppression globally until the day U.$ imperialism is overcome. All U.$ citizens should start from the point of view that they are reforming criminals.They had me at "accomplices."
Update: Earlier MIM "fun" here y here.