Tuesday, July 04, 2006

First Annual Memorial Fourth of July Ignoration

We "camped" this weekend in the "wilds" of Dillon "Reservoir" (oops, one too many scare quotes there), which is considerably more refined and prosperous than our own neighborhood:

Oh, we have a boat, do we? Well, bully for us. (The D-blogs, needless to say, do not have a boat. Leaky canoe, yes; boat, no.)

The Hegemonator: The D-blog's father-in-law Wendell--Army Air, career Air Force, dedicated minion of the military-industrial-recreational-vehicle complex. Wendell has a cat named Chipper whom every evening he hand-feeds shrimp while he himself enjoys a single (eight-ounce) martini. The complacent fascist (Wendell, not Chipper) calls this "happy hour."

Dillon Reservoir "not natural"

Maybe not, but it has the best frisbee golf course in the state!

Hippies tee off. See the daypack bottom center? They had about 12 different frisbees in there--putters, drivers--hell, for all I know mashies and wedgies too. Or are those the same thing? Shut up. Who cares? And who am I quoting with that "not natural" in the subhead? Nobody!

Each fairway runs 325 to 375 yards and has a par of 3 or 4. Here's the 13th "hole" (with scare quotes you need to taper):

The dirt is the "green" (tapering!)

We were going to play, but there were too many people waiting in between rainshowers.

It rained a lot, unfortunately, and was cloudy when it didn't.
These are some Pine Beetle-murdered trees (clouds in back).

We read in the tent while Billy made crop circles. He does this by yanking his frisbee around with his front paws:

Aerial view. He makes them in snow, too.

I didn't say they were good crop circles. He's a dog, for Chrissakes.

We've never figured out why he does this, but it gets annoying:

Dirt flies everywhere like you've set you're lawn chair up in a construction site. (Despite the axe, however, no animal that didn't deserve it was harmed during this camping trip.)

Oh, and here's Billy Bob's high-school graduation picture:

(I actually took it this weekend. Billy Bob never made it through junior high, let alone high school. He's real touchy about it too. I'd need a face transplant if he knew I told anyone. Noble hound my ass.)

Unproductive fun was had by most.

Update: The D-a-W says her "little Eichmann" of a daddy's daily martini contains more like 12 ounces of wodka. Probably this kind. Guess that's why he's such a happy hegemon.

Update II: Only by blogging would the Drunkablog ever have learned that there exists such a thing as kosher vodka.

Update III: Yes, a "crop circle" by definition should contain a "circle" in a "crop" (tapering!). That a Billy Bob "crop circle" contains neither, however, is really none of your business.

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