Movieness

A few gems from The Film Snob's Dictionary:

Apparatus

"Comically obtuse blather-term used in semiotics-driven film studies to denote both the camera and the 'cinematic system of meaning'; stubbornly used by semioticions as if in fear that they'll be reamed with a cattle prod if the words camera or narrative pass through their lips."

Howard, Clint

"Cult actor with squeaky voice and enormous cranium, best known for his brief appearances in the movies of A-list older brother Ron." The authors also note that Clint appeared in the weird Star Trek episode 'The Corbomite Maneuver" as the deep-voiced little alien you want to crush with your shoe, Balok.

Siegel, Don

Director of the original Invasion of the Body Snatchers and the Clint Eastwood masterworks Dirty Harry and Escape from Alcatraz. "Siegel elicits strong public endorsements from wannabe-toughster Snobs trying to make up for dermatological and penile shortcomings."

What a racket these guys have. The first in their developing series, The Rock Snob's Dictionary, is probably just as funny as Film Snobs; the last, The Spelunking Snob's Dictionary (to be published in November, 2065), probably won't be.