Regards!

Here's an e-mail I received some years ago (everything, of course, sic):

Dear Sir/Ma,

l [name],l hereby seek for an apartment/room in your reputable house. l am 30 years old of age,married,kind,honest,God fearing,caring and respectful,l don't smoke,non alcholic. l work as an auditor in a multi-national company in the ([blankety-blank] TOBACCO P.L.C.).I travel around working on assignments and supervising projects for my company and n! ow there is an official assigment given to me to monitor a project in Denver,of which will enable me look for accomodation on whic! h l would be staying for a period of six months for the completion of this assignment. l will like to rent your apartment/room for the six months assignment at hand.Please,get back to me as soon as possible with the final asking price including all utilities of the apartment.Regards!

Update: I,Drinkoblo!g ,I am ,unfor!tunately, alcholic.