Depressed? Funny looking? Got no "pep?"

Why not try NorthDenverTribuneWatch!

In this week's North Denver Tribune:

Mayor Hickenlooper (North Denver Tribune calls him by his full name; the Rocky, rather too familarly, calls him "Hick") is pictured doing some ceremonial spadework for the pedestrian bridge to link Highlands with Downtown;

Old Cowtown Denver is remembered in "When cows were king in Denver stockyards" (King? Maybe Louis XVI);

This week's guest editorial is "The six dumbest things moms do." (They're kind of all-over-the-place with these guest thingies, aren't they? Last issue, remember, featured the marginally coherent Bill Bonner's "The great empire rolling over," about, well, you can probably guess.)

Ah, here's "Crime Beat"--I've shown up in one or two of these myself. But darn, this one is bogus, no local police blotter stuff at all, just Officer Tony (Lopez)'s crimestopper tips. Here's one:

Please secure all personal property of value in the vehicle in the vehicle trunk or glove compartment, or in other locations in the vehicle that would make the valuables not visible from the exterior of the vehicle.

But Officer Tony, what if the vehicle in which I'm currently envehicled has holes in critical vehicle areas? Hmmmm?

Here's a good one: "Three Iraq war veterans share their accounts from the war zone." Actually it was three members of Iraq Veterans Against the War (IRAVETAGAIthWA), one of whom is pictured earlier this year at hallowed "Camp Casey in Texas," who shared their accounts, but, you know, whatever.

And finally, a brief: "Sex trafficking and other forms of modern slavery meeting."

Uhhh, think I'm busy that night.