Tragic sneezing accident
This, you will be horrified (synonym for "amused") to learn, is the D-blog's formerly noble brow:
If the D-a-W is around when somebody asks me how I got tagged, she thinks it's funny to say, "Sometimes I just can't take it any more, you know? All the time jibber-jabber jibber-jabber, all the time 'give me a dollar, mommy,' all the time 'uh-oh, poop butt.' Sometimes it just takes a good elbow shot to shut him up."
But this is not what happened. I just sneezed with insufficient attention to the space around me, and smashed my precious upper head at barely subsonic speed into the counter of our really charming kitchen island. Hurt like a motherfucker, actually knocked me to my knees, and I bled rather spectacularly for a minute.
It's better now, but I still look like my Third Eye is trying to open. Ick.
Update: sneezing accidents are quite common; most of them, of course, are car wrecks.